If you haven’t read The Happiness Project by Gretchen Rubin, I highly recommend it. I read this book about a month or two before the new year and decided that I wanted to do my own Happiness Project in 2019.
I am by no means sad or depressed, I’m not about that life. I’m generally already a happy person and look for the good in people. However, I know there are always areas of improvement and I wanted to build better habits and find different things to focus on each month, rather than make year long resolutions that likely wouldn’t stick.
To begin, Gretchen Rubin comes up with her 12 commandments to live by for her year (which I was definitely inspired by). I chose 9 because that’s my favorite number, no other reason than that really. Just find what works for you.
My 9 commandments are:
Next, I decided on what I want to focus on for each month. Each month gets its own resolutions. I decided that I want to read more as well, so I am choosing 2 books each month that relate to whatever it is I’m focusing on.
So to begin the year, I started with marriage.
With a little one on the way in February, I thought marriage was perfect thing to focus on since this is the last month of just us for quite awhile.
I more so started this resolution in November when I started my last trimester as things really began to set in and become real.
We’ve made it a point go on date nights, have in-home dates, and focus on each other and it’s been amazing. Be on the look out for “The Last 90 Days” blog that will be coming up soon showing you all our adventures leading up to the baby.
Phil has been incredibly patient with me through this pregnancy and our marriage. We have completely different love languages and it’s taken me awhile to figure that whole thing out…haha. But I’m doing much better with expressing my love to him in ways that it makes sense for him and he has been responding in kind. It’s made all the difference and we haven’t ever been more in love with each other than we are now.
In January, I working on not nagging because he does so much for our household (cooking and cleaning!). He says I don’t nag but sometimes I feel like I do. Fight right just means that in our disagreements we listen to each other and determine, “Is this really something we should be arguing about?” Usually if it’s not we’ll laugh it off together. Being aware and grateful is truly seeing the small things and saying, “Thank you” or acknowledging that I’ve noticed something he’s done for us. Listening, look back to the last 2 resolutions! Daily embraces. One of Phil’s love languages is physical touch so I make it a point to kiss good morning and good night and hug him every time he walks through the door. Love notes is something we’ve always been pretty good at; see my Stuck on Love blog series! But now in our new home, we have a chalk board wall that we’ll surprise each other with silly notes all the time.
The books I’ve decided to “read” or listen to in my case, are books I’ve had in Audible for awhile: 7 Principles for Making a Marriage Work by John Gottman and Modern Romance by Aziz Ansari.
Are you thinking of starting a Happiness Project or want to join me? Check our Gretchen Rubin’s website: https://gretchenrubin.com/books/the-happiness-project/about-the-book/ Her blog also has awesome resources to help get you started!